Morrissey's Rules Of Debate

1. Whether it is a casual or heated debate, always use personal attacks on your opponent as an integral part of your argument.

2. Occasionally forget and always mispronounce your opponent’s name.

3. Always make up facts to support your position.

4. When it is to your benefit, always deny your involvement regardless of the facts.

5. Insist that all points your opponent may raise are ridiculous and refuse further comment on the basis that it is a waste of your time.

6. Refuse to explain any points you may raise on the basis that they are too complicated for your opponent to understand.

7. Whenever your opponent quotes a statistic, insist that it is incorrect.

8. Occasionally interrupt to announce you weren’t paying attention, and ask your opponent to repeat himself.

9. If your opponent should happen to raise a valid point, insist that he was recently quoted as advocating the opposite position.

10. When appropriate, laugh out loud at any points or questions your opponent may raise, then ignore them completely.