HAPPY BASTILLE DAY!
Here are some ways that you can celebrate this special French holiday :
1. Go to your local prison and shoot spitballs at the guards. Then run away.
2. Take up chain-smoking
3. Cut the heads off all your children's dolls and action figures. If they complain tell them you are Robespierre and they're next if they don't shut up.
4. Skip the shower 'n' shave....it's unpatriotic
5. If you are married or single....menage a trois tonight!
6. Head-butt an Italian in the chest
7. Hold a bottle of Cabernet Savignon in your right hand and a plate piled high with expensive cheeses in your left, then run around your neighborhood with them screaming, "I surrender! I surrender!"
8. Plant a German flag in your backyard and, every time you walk by the window, give it a real dirty look
9. Go to your local pond and grab the first critter you can. Take it home and smother it in a buttery garlic glaze. Dinner's served!
10. Spend the day speaking a sing-song gibberishy nonsense to everyone you see. If they say "Excuse me, I don't understand you," call them "Stupid Americans" and march away with your nose in the air.
1. Go to your local prison and shoot spitballs at the guards. Then run away.
2. Take up chain-smoking
3. Cut the heads off all your children's dolls and action figures. If they complain tell them you are Robespierre and they're next if they don't shut up.
4. Skip the shower 'n' shave....it's unpatriotic
5. If you are married or single....menage a trois tonight!
6. Head-butt an Italian in the chest
7. Hold a bottle of Cabernet Savignon in your right hand and a plate piled high with expensive cheeses in your left, then run around your neighborhood with them screaming, "I surrender! I surrender!"
8. Plant a German flag in your backyard and, every time you walk by the window, give it a real dirty look
9. Go to your local pond and grab the first critter you can. Take it home and smother it in a buttery garlic glaze. Dinner's served!
10. Spend the day speaking a sing-song gibberishy nonsense to everyone you see. If they say "Excuse me, I don't understand you," call them "Stupid Americans" and march away with your nose in the air.
posted by smelly at 7:50 AM
Firefox Live Bookmark
4 Comments:
Let a German into your house, give him everything you own and than wait for an American to get it all back for you. After you get it all back be rude to the American.
For the diet challenged:
Hold a bottle of Cabernet Savignon in your right hand and a plate piled high with expensive cheeses in your left, then run around your neighborhood with them screaming, "I surrender to a high cholesterol count! I surrender to a high cholesterol count!"
Have some French Fries and then French vanilla Ice cream for dessert...Thats about all I know that the French have contributed to my life.
Q: Ya know what you do the day AFTER Bastille Day?
A: Make fun of the French
Post a Comment
<< The Hubbub Home Page